Cartoons Vs. Boredom

My site’s glorious title, Cyborg Ape, comes from a pile of ludicrous cartoons I drew in high school.

Cyborg Ape

I used any excuse to draw a cartoon at any time. In the ninth-grade, I had to design a make-believe business as a group project. For lack of any non-idiotic ideas, we decided to enter the market in extra-terrestrial investigation, naming our startup ‘The UFO Patrol’. The snazzy graphics were the bulk of the “work” I put into it.

UFO Patrol2

Alien invasionAlien on jetpack

And this is my rendition of a goofy French teenager we saw in a video. I am deeply sorry to any French teenagers who take this offensively. It’s not you.

french guy

(Challenge: Can you draw someone more hyperbolically happy than this?)

I often drew between classes, at lunch or any other free moment during the school day. Check out this next alien-themed masterpiece. An unfortunate newborn is chosen by a pair of extra-terrestrial scientists as a specimen for human experiments.

baby and aliens

The researchers attempt to communicate with the earthling, which their hypothesis had assumed would have an advanced intellect.

baby and aliens 1

Disappointed with the obvious conclusion, they eject the baby out into deep space.

The End

baby and aliens 2

I did not intend for my pregnant teacher to see this, but she looked out of curiosity. Apparently not seeing the humor, she asked why I couldn’t put this much time and effort into schoolwork. Isn’t the answer obvious? This was my escape.

Alternate ending: The baby whips out his bottle, which the aliens perceive as a weapon that projects a deadly chemical substance.

baby and aliens 3

baby and aliens 4

With the ship now vacant, the baby zooms off to start a life of space exploration, leaving two queer little aliens stranded on Earth. “It has commandeered our vessel,” one of them says.

baby and aliens 5

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